Top Ten Things I Want To Accomplish Before I Die
Oct 24th, 2007 by Stephen
kay why el eh wrote:My question to you:
What are the top 10 things you want to accomplish before you die?
And while WE (the loyal readers of PonderPlace.com) read your amazingly amusing but yet better be a fully answered Ponderment, WE (the loyal readers of PonderPlace.com) should ’save the baby’ by commenting on this Ponderment.
So ask yourself, What are the top 10 things YOU (the loyal readers of PonderPlace.com) want to accomplish before you die?
Alright, my list of Top Ten Things I Want To Accomplish Before I Die.
- Put an End to World Peace (requests): Lets face it, we are never going to have world peace. It’s a fact, people love killing people. Just look at history, killing people is the human species favorite past-time. Why go about whimsically wishing for world peace (which gets you nothing), when you could be using that energy on something constructive; like world domination.
- See Pigs Fly: This is a triple hitter. This means that not only would I get to see pigs fly. But it means that in conjunction with this, I’d also know (yet have no way of proving) that hell has frozen over, and that somewhere out there, there is a fat lady singing.
- 193MPH Natural High: This one is going to be difficult. Basically I want to arrange a course, one which covers several cities connected by highways. This course would then be used for races, in which I’d be able to push my Bugatti Veyron to the requisite 193MPH, yet maintain a very safe buffer from the Veyron’s max speed (253MPH). Oh, and I’d like to do this with a sparse amount of regular commuters, just to heighten my sense of speed.
- Discover the Quack: I would like to know why the quack of a duck does not echo.
- Silent shoes: This builds off of #4
. Using my newfound knowledge, I’d like to design shoes which do not have any sound at all, no “click, clack, click, clack” of your heals as you walk along. - Silent Assassin: This one builds off of #5
. Using my newly designed shoes. I’d become a world renowned assassin. Yet somewhere along the way there would be a huge plot twist, revealing myself as a victim who just happens to also be an assassin. But I continue being an assassin, instead of whimping out like Jason Borne. But I’d still be innocent (I’m a victim). - Sing a duet: I want to find that fat lady (see accomplishment #2
) and upon finding her, I’d begin to sing along. And because she cannot stop, I’d eventually learn to perform great solos while she maintained an excellent background track. This is making the assumption she is an accomplished singer; if not, I’d give it a few years and come back to see if she’s improved. - The Gerbil Whisperer: It is not something the public is aware of; But gerbils have an affinity for whispering as well. Somehow the horses’ managed to steal the spotlight in this area, leaving the gerbils to fend for themselves. Needless to say, their social growth has been considerably stunted by this negligence (shame on you whispering society!). I would like to un-stunt the whole of gerbil society.
- Roofie Me Please: Being that I’ve never had the chance to be roofied. I would like to obtain a roofie, and use it on myself. I feel I can trust me because I’d be unable to make any inappropriate moves or take advantage of myself while I was under the effects.
- Phenomena Discovery: I’d like to discover the scientific link between bread always landing butter-side-down. And cats landing on their feet. I’m confident the secret lies in an obscure link somewhere deep within their ancestry tree(s).
Submit your own Ponderment requests HERE.
How about internation law.
Hi
My name is Duffy Gorski and I am the co-founder of the We Want World Peace Organization (WWWPO) established in Alpena MI USA. I would like to bring you attention to our organizations plan and challenge for World Peace through a system of international law based on human rights driven by the people of the world without influence from Governments, Corporations and Religions. Please go to our website read our plan, register and take the challenge.
The $100,000.00 challenge is a win, win, win challenge because everyone in the world wins. 1. The person or group that submits a better plan then our wins the $100,000.00 and the world wins a better plan then the We Want World Peace Organization’s. 2. The world wins because there is a plan for a system of international law based on human rights. 3. The We Want World Peace Organization wins because our goal to raise the awareness of World Peace trough a system of international law and order based on human rights is met and the world has a our plan or a better plan.
Love, Peace and God Bless
[website link removed]
Duffy Gorski
Dear Mr. Duffy Gorski,
Did you read my post? I realize you probably keep a rigorous schedule of spreading the word on different sites related to world peace (at least your spam is supporting a good cause as apposed to Viagra or related merchandise).
However, if you were to review item #1, you can plainly see that one of my accomplishments is not to erect world peace, but to stop the requests for it. Which, oddly enough places us both on opposite teams (you requesting world peace, me wanting people to stop asking for world peace).
Now, just because I take this stance does not mean that I wouldn’t enjoy the benefits of world peace, so I’m going to leave your comment; besides, the irony alone is worth keeping it.
I am however going to remove any reference to your website, I’d hate for it to be a website with virus bots or hijack links. Plus google will help anyone interested in finding you. ;)
Thanks for stopping by ponderplace.com!
Stephen
[...] wrote some more, thought thoughtfully and wrote the results. And the final outcome can be seen here. How long did it take? Well, from start to having the lackluster graphic complete was 2 [...]
whoever wrote this ponderment is GENIUS.. anyways, my top ten!!!
1. Go to Paris and meet a hot male model who falls in love with me after only 2 days and then i break it off along with crush his whipped over me heart… Sorry paris dude :(
2. grow out my hair (on my head) until it touches my butt crack. iv always wanted really long hair (on my head)
3. I want to save someones life, have a tear up moment with them and be known as that short big boobied girl who saved someones live.
4. not get married
5. not have kids
6. win the lottery and put most of the winnings towards finding the cure for meltygoobrain syndrome. the rest im just ganna blow on retarded things like toys (the kind you play with(none that are ment for sticking in body parts(gross)))and candy.
7. i want to be able to meet brad pitt and make out with him and when people ask me how it was, id pop my collar and say “ehh it was ALRIGHT”.
8. find stephens lost handicap kitty
9. be able to eat 50 pounds of food and not gain a pound.
10. i want to travel around the world and come across “i dream of jeannie” bottle and have a hot MALE jeannie in my life for all eternity, who does everything i want and while this is all happening i do not want to have a snotty, b*tch*, bratty attitude.
the end.
KABLAM!
[...] wrote some more, thought thoughtfully and wrote the results. And the final outcome can be seen here. How long did it take? Well, from start to having the lackluster graphic complete was 2 [...]