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shy girl shy guy
Last weeks Meanderment Social SNAFU: An Insight On The Pursuit Of Evolution (Part I) ended on a particularly genuine note.

However true my final sentiments in Part I; there exists a type of individual whose heart is unlocked via alternative methods.

Picking up where we left off (and you will want to read Part I if you’ve not, click here). We were looking for the Golden Key. The one thing that would change everything for our example.

Communication is the key.

It sounds simple enough. And for many it is that simple. However those of us who were not endowed with stellar communication skills, it serves as a significant barrier to our social advancement.

People are ironic in that the one thing which holds us back from one another remains consistent for all individuals. That being fear.

People fear one another naturally. Fear is brought on by an element of the unknown. That applies to everything easily enough, but even more so to people around us.

We as people have our expectations of what another person is or is not. We hold even higher expectations for those with whom we hope to associate in a relationship. It is due to these higher expectations that our anxiety is also increased and leads to a more poignant fear as to the outcome of this possible relationship.

Contrasting this fear is the appealing safety of finding a seat in an obscure corner, and observing those potential persons who strike your fancy. You then mathematically approach the theoretical outcome of success, and throughout the night bask in the simulated joy of your successful conversation and subsequent involvement … then the lights come on, breaking up the social event, and there you are, still alone, vacancy light flickering.

You are lucky because this day-dreaming can be taken home. You’ll find yourself basking in the glow of a romantic fire. Favorite beverage at hand, and with eyes closed, those many images of people who make you happy will float by. Does real life get better? (in this case real life being talking to a girl and spending the evening with her)

I’d have to say that it is subjective. Think about it. On the one hand, you’ve got your imagination. Your wildest dreams can unfold. On the other hand, you’ve got a stranger, who potentially will turn into the nag of your life. That’s so romantic.

Focus, communication is the key.

There are many who have a great talent for communication. Despite their appearance; a greater amount of these people are individuals who were at one time just like you — shy and awkward in social situations.

Just as all things in life, those that are worth having are worth working for. How to work for this depends upon your own personality. If you learn well in a class environment, find a workshop. If you do well on your own, find a good self-help book. But it always comes down to doing, you need to get out of your comfort zone, and go talk to strangers.

Realize that your greatest enemy is fear. Your greatest ally is communication and your greatest doubts are shared by those you hope to communicate with.

Title image used with permission and courtesy of Thomas Loreille, check out the original here.

Read it in the bathroom! Print It! Read it in the bathroom! Print It!

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4 Responses to “Social SNAFU: An Insight On The Pursuit Of Evolution (Part II)”

  1. […] Look for part two next week! Part II has been posted! Click here! […]

  2. on 17 Oct 2007 at 3:01 pmAmelia

    You are lucky because this day-dreaming can be taken home. You’ll find yourself basking in the glow of a romantic fire. Favorite beverage at hand, and with eyes closed, those many images of people who make you happy will float by. Does real life get better? (in this case real life being talking to a girl and spending the evening with her)

    I’d have to say that it is subjective. Think about it. On the one hand, you’ve got your imagination. Your wildest dreams can unfold. On the other hand, you’ve got a stranger, who potentially will turn into the nag of your life. That’s so romantic.

    The difference between finding life in one’s imagination (no matter how full) and taking the chance out there in the “real world” oh no being that often you realize that there is so much more that one couldn’t even begin to imagine.

  3. on 17 Oct 2007 at 3:25 pmStephen

    Oh and i forgot to mention in the article, thanks to Amelia for the encouraging in pursuing the idea of following up on the original writing. I was just going to leave it at a sexist zinger, but i digress. ;)

  4. […] and ended in .info. So basically people go to the site and it says… (Here is my writing that this pingback was posted on) Stephen wrote a fantastic post today on “Social SNAFU: An […]

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