Ponder Place

Mike wrote:

I have a secret admirer at work. I am married and I think the admirer is a guy, which makes it even worse. I could handle it easier if it was a female. I think he works in the shop. I mean he is a cool guy if it is him but I am straight, you know! I have always been taught to treat others with kindness.

Do I just ignore the notes and just act like nothing is happening or do I confront him. He is just a young kid I don’t want to destroy this guys.

Wow, there is a lot of ground to cover in this one.

First of all, when you refer to “destroy this guy”, is this a physical destruction? Are you planning on physically beating him?

If this is the case, I’d just like to point out that in most cultures this goes against the description of “always been taught to treat others with kindness”. Unless this individual is a masochist; I’m confident he would not appreciate a physical beating.

Otherwise, if you are referring to “destroying” as in the emotional-break-down sense, I wouldn’t worry about it. It is my (untrained) opinion that this would still benefit your admirer. He may not recognize it this way, but here is how it would work.

You would confront him (and according to your estimates, this would destroy him). He would then go away from this confrontation destroyed. And giving that this affection for you would indicate he is homosexual. He would then have adequate reason to spend some “special” time with another homosexual buddy. And if he is smart, he will utilize this tragic event to gain ground on whoever his “plan B” person is. I’m pretty sure homosexuals still have “plan A’s” and “plan B’s” in the relationship world.

Anyway, this destructive event in his life would potentially bring him to new heights in his other relationships. Plus, secret admirers are just simple crushes, and it is likely it would not faze him at all. Or it could just be that this is all a creation of your subconscious, which is somehow trying to inform you that you are indeed homosexual (no offense intended if you take offense to that type of suggestion (no offense to any homosexuals who might be reading this and take offense at the suggestion that someone would take offense to the suggestion that they are homosexual))(whew that was a long one).

Otherwise, if this admirer is not just a “light” admirer it is highly likely that by confronting him, it will indeed crush him. In this event it is almost an absolute that he will stalk you until he has discovered the location of your home. At which point he will patiently (I hear homosexuals are super patient) wait until he has developed a sense of your living pattern’s. He will then choose an opportune moment to sneak into your sleeping quarters and bind you.

Now at this point you will still be alive, but being bound, you will not be able to do anything about this presumably undesirable situation.

You need not fear sexual advances, as your homosexual admirer is likely fueled by hatred and rage at this point. He will probably go right to stripping you (in a non-sexual way) and peeling the skin from your legs etc.

I’ll not detail the probable activities of this night any further. As it could be my subconscious trying to tell me that I’m secretly a homosexual serial killer who skins people, etc.

And we don’t want that, now do we.

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